Showing posts with label conversation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label conversation. Show all posts

Monday, June 15, 2020

An Honest Conversation About Race - Darryl Rivers, Winston Price, and Damon Pampolina

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VoiceAmerica  0:04  
One problem facing people at many levels of business is how to make time for a work life and a personal life. Do you find that one seems to keep getting in the way of the other? This is the work life balance with Rick Morris. Even if you're not involved in the business world, you'll have a lot to gain by tuning into today's show. Now, here's your host, Rick Morris.

Rick A. Morris  0:26  
And welcome to another edition of the work life balance on this Friday afternoon. We're really, really, really excited about this episode. And I'm going to skip all of my normal stuff that I do prior because we've only got an hour and there's not enough time. But I do want to give just a little bit of a lead in here. First of all, we're going to ask for your open and honest listening. And we're also going to ask that you just stay with us. So I have brought on today some of my key confidence people that I reach out to people I look up to and so I'll introduce them really quickly. We've got Mr. Damon Pampolina in the house, who's who's a dear friend of mine, and I produce his podcast we've got my executive producer of the show for four plus years Mr. Winston Price in the house. And of course my brother, Darryl Rivers. And you know, Darryl is is not only an ex police officer, but he's one of the top five de escalation trainers in the world, bar none. And as I talked with these gentlemen throughout the last couple of weeks, and it's been a very difficult couple of weeks for a lot of people to figure out what's going on and and you know, I I've asked, and I've listened and I've heard a lot in the biggest thing that I keep hearing is, you know, you start with your home, right, you start with your home, when you want to have any kind of conversation about race about anything that's going on with George Floyd or the protests or anything, you need to start with your home but like, how do I start at home? And so these are the people that I reach out to and start to talk to and to make sure that I am Understand what what's happening out there. And in the whole time I was getting counsel from them, I was like, man, we we've got to do this in a broader context. This is a conversation that needs to be a lot more public. So I'm going to bring everybody in right now. And I'm going to start just to try to round it out there. I'll just say hello real quick and tell everybody who you are.

Darryl Rivers  2:19  
Hey, my name is Darryl Rivers, as my brother Rick says, My brother from another mother. I'm just a simple guy born and raised Detroit, Michigan, right out of high school, joined the military. After that I joined a police department in Detroit, transferred out in Arizona and retired from there. I was a hostage negotiator and things of that nature and the current state that I'm in right now. I do de escalation training all across the nation. for local law enforcement. Best my primary thing I'll say 80% of my clients are law enforcement and or government entities. And we're in a interesting position right now, to be able to talk about our experiences and Things of that nature. So demand on law enforcement training as it pertains to things about race about police profiling, brutality and things of that nature. It's definitely change from what I've experienced in the past five or six years. So this should be interesting.

Rick A. Morris  3:18  
And then of course, Winston jump in. Again, my my executive producer, but you and I've had many, many conversations on this subject.

Winston Price  3:24  
Oh, goodness. First off, I want to say hi to Darryl because I grew up in Inkster, Michigan. I went to school in Romulus people's community Baptist Church was my church in Westland and actually live in Arizona right now. No way. So yeah, Weston Price senior executive producer voice America talk radio network. That's all you need to

Rick A. Morris  3:44  
know. I want to get to it. Absolutely. And then, of course, most of you who follow me who know me know this next gentleman Damon Pampolina is in the house. Hey, what's up, Damon?

Damon Pampolina  3:53  
How are you, sir? honor to be on with these other two gentlemen today, Rick, and thank you, man for giving me this. opportunity to talk about the subject matter today. We appreciate it. And so

Rick A. Morris  4:03  
Damon you and I had a conversation last week as well in so again, forgive me for my sense of maybe being sensitive or not sensitive at this point. But one of the biggest things that plagues me and I've told you this Winston in Darryl as well, and I'm gonna frame it in a business context first as a consultant when I go into a company The one thing I hate is when people run their resume for me right to tell me how important they are whatever work they've done doesn't matter to me, right? Let's just get to work. Let's get going. But they've got to like, have an ego about that piece. And one of the biggest things that plagues me is is I feel like I've grown up pretty progressive but how do I night How do I start a conversation Darryl with you without whitesplaining or having to run down the fact that you know, you know, I have black friends like how do you not sound racist when you go I'm not racist. I got black friends or I know I grew up around black people so I totally understand in all of that is is what you hear most often. When we start to talk about race, what's the proper way to start that conversation?

Darryl Rivers  5:06  
And you know what? That's a perfect question. Because us as as African American people of color, we hear that all the time. Oh, I, you know, I got black friends. It's just like saying, Yeah, I always get pebbles in my shoes, man. I absolutely love it. I mean, like, you know, I get it all the time. Like, you know, I got my shoe right now, and it's awesome. No, you don't frickin like it just because you have it doesn't mean like it. Um, what I would say is what our preference is. Let's just say I am a white male in America. And you know what? I love all of my brothers and sisters, no matter what their race color creed is for whatever. Rick, what I will say is, you know, somebody dears people in my life, some of my best friends, some of my closest circle of friends. They don't look like me. They don't share the same pigmentation as I do. You know, so it doesn't matter if they're quality individually a quality individual. I don't you know, of course we all see color. Unless you're blind, literally.

Rick A. Morris  5:57  
Well, let's take that one though. You hear that all the time. I'm not ready. I don't see color. You see color. You see color? Or you say that to me?

Damon Pampolina  6:06  
Yeah, as for crappy eyes, I've always felt it should be the opposite. You do see color, you recognize it and you're respected. And that's what makes us so great. That's what makes the human race so great is all our different shades. So I agree with you guys on that I that comment drives me crazy. You know, I don't you know?

Winston Price  6:24  
Yeah, so what I've come to find is that you have people with good intentions, and you have people with bad intentions. I used to do some martial arts training, self defense training at Indiana University out in Bloomington. And we would say that people with the best intentions, sometimes give the worst advice and say the worst things. Okay, so I have people tell me that you know, I don't see color and what they're saying is, is I respect you. They're not saying I don't see color. They're saying no matter who you are, I respect you. And they don't understand what they're saying is actually offensive.

I feel good.

Rick A. Morris  7:06  
Yeah, it's beautifully said, and let's let you know what I'm, we're gonna be peeling this onion, we're gonna get into some junk gang. And we've got a ton of people out there on Facebook Live phone us right now and they're going to join in the conversation and for those of you that are on Facebook live, you certainly can pop in a question there. We'll see if we can get it answered. But let's I want to be just completely honest and transparent. I've had a not a, I've had a bias, not an intended bias. But I've had a bias before. And I do not consider myself I consider myself a valuer of all people. Right. But I've had that that time where I'm walking somewhere and I've seen a group of white women before I've seen a group black men before but I've instantly had a internal bias that made me react in a certain way. How do we start to realize Understand what our internal biases are and how we can start to work with those. Does that make sense there?

Darryl Rivers  8:04  
It makes perfect sense. I think the main thing is understanding how we have internal biases really realizing that what we're exposed to and how our brain processes it. So you know, me, the whole human behavior, cognitive function kind of thing. You know, there's certain parts of our brain that that does things before we even recognize that something has been done. So it's three things that our brains do immediately upon seeing any person whatsoever number one, we say, is that person a threat or not? That's the number one thing that our brain does is involuntary. It happens it's a survival mechanism. Number two, in this particular brain system is, is that person sexually compatible with me? That's why when you see someone you like, is that a guy or a girl? You don't even think about it pops up in your head, dude, is that a dude or a chick? It's like Pat from Saturday Night Live. You don't know what it is right? You're like, you know, you don't know. Right? And then the third thing is do I like this? person and then that subconscious part it takes place and then we logically try to make sense of it. Now, with that being said, if I'm constantly program, that certain people are dangerous, whether it's through Hollywood, whether it's through the news media, whether it's through, you know what, hey, when these people are doing it as a protest, when these people are doing it, they're thugs, whatever that programming may be, that part of our brain and our limbic system called the thalamus. It doesn't differentiate between Fact or Fiction. Okay, that it's in there in the moment I intake that information thalamus says up, that's a threat because that's what we've been exposed to. So then you say, well, it's a guy and I don't think I like them. So now all of a sudden you be trying to you try to make logic of why you feel the way that you feel. And then you say, well, maybe they're this or maybe that and then we begin to assume, and it's not like you're actively trying to not like someone it's Just an environment in a systematic exposure that we've been conditioned to, to function in. So sometimes we have what's called an implicit bias without our own knowing without our own doing. And that's just the way that our society is made up right now.

Rick A. Morris  10:18  
Winston, you wanna, you want to join in on

Winston Price  10:20  
Oh, I'm happy that you brought up the thalamus because a lot of people don't understand their hormones yet, so they don't understand what a hormone cascade is. There's a difference from your sympathetic nervous system. And then the hormone cascade when you step on attack, okay, it's over. When you get frightened at a hormone cascade starts that can be with you for weeks. Yep. Yep,

Rick A. Morris  10:46  
absolutely. So guys, we're gonna be taking some breaks here, but when we when we come back, I know that Damon jump in with a question and then I urge you guys though while we're on break, on radio or even Facebook to go find Darryl rivers. Facebook page DeRose DeRose video that he posted it was just a couple of days ago, right? It was two days ago. It's already got 5000 6000 views. It's crazy. But it comes from the heart of somebody who is and was and still believes in police officers, but is still dealing with what's what's happening. And I'm gonna get you to tap into that a little bit here on the show, but we're gonna take a quick break right here. We'll be right back and listen to the work life balance with a whole crew of people this time. Thank you, right.

VoiceAmerica  11:34  
Are you frustrated with the overall productivity of your project management processes? Do you lack consistency and project delivery? Our squared consulting provides end to end services to assist companies of all sizes and realizing and improving the value of project management. Whether you want to build a project management office, train project managers or learn how to bring the oversight and governance to your project processes. R squared has tailored best practices to help you in all areas of project management, visit r squared consulting.com are you getting the most out of your project management software? In many cases, it is not the software that is failing but the implementation limitations or processes surrounding the use of that software. r squared can analyze your current use and help improve your return on investment. r squared can also suggest the best software for your organization and goals and assist in the selection implementation and training. Allow r squared to ensure that you are getting the value of your investment visit r squared consulting.com today

from the boardroom to you

voice America business network.

You are tuned in to the work life balance to reach Rick Morris or his guest today. We'd love to have Call into the program at 1-866-472-5790. Again, that's 1-866-472-5790. If you'd rather send an email Rick can be reached at our Morris at r squared consulting.com. Now back to the work life balance.

Rick A. Morris  13:20  
And we're back on this Friday afternoon to the work life balance. Thank you so much for hanging along. We've got a big crew today we've got my man Daryl rivers, my executive producer Winston price, and my boy Damon Pam Polina on the line. And Damon, I'm gonna throw throw it to you for our next question.

Damon Pampolina  13:35  
Yeah, Rick, we talked the other day about this. And, you know, we're sharing it say quite a bit. That racism is something that is taught or it's taught in the homes. It's not something that you're born with. One of the main objectives I think should be from from Mr. Floyd's passing, and unfortunately, it took an innocent man passing to get us to this point, but it should be the best way way to handle our young ones, a little boy's chin. And to go about teaching that that common respect, lack of racism within the home, all that stuff. That would be probably my biggest question, as we want to break this cycle, you know?

And I don't know who would want to jump on that question, but man, I would, I would love to hear it.

Rick A. Morris  14:25  
Go for it, Winston.

Winston Price  14:27  
So, the first thing I would say that any best approach is going to be a multi dimensional approach. There is not just one thing, and it is something that is going to be done as a parent until the day you die. It's not going to be a one day, a one hour a one week thing. First and foremost, the parent needs to lead by example. First and foremost, because that's what that's how all children learn. They learn from their examples and the parent is the first teacher. The parent is the first coach. The parent is the first mentor. So whatever they see there Do that's what they're going to do also inlay other dimensions throughout time take them to different war memorials, take them to different slave memorials. Let them know who is what, teach them, yourself, show them you have an interest and

I'll be quiet they're

Damon Pampolina  15:20  
awesome. Awesome.

Darryl Rivers  15:24  
Yeah, I can add anything to that. And I really you know, I like that listen when you say go take them to the warm waters give them that history lesson from your perspective. You know, I would think another thing that would be really, really beneficial is really like exposure and producing to your friends. Let them see you interact personally not from a textbook thing. You know, sample say, hey, look, these are, this is my circle. This These are the people that I trust. These are the people that I talk to because they see the people you talk to, those are going to be the kind of people they talk to you know when I always used to say about my daughters is that, you know, I recognize that I'm going to be the first man that they ever love. You know, I mean, really think about it, right? So so I have to give them that perspective of you know what you win when you see your dad and you know, and who you're going to choose in the future. You know, you should see how versatile and diverse Your dad is so that you do not split second select someone that's very myopic or self centered or stuck on what it is that they what they view like to be that that's not a good view. So you know, it's just the exposure to your world, and how you function with diversity and communicate and actually have genuine love for people who don't look like you.

Rick A. Morris  16:45  
It's beautiful, beautiful, guys, I'm loving this conversation. Let's keep it rockin let's and let's continue to touch tender subjects here. A lot of stuff about defund the police right now a lot of stuff about police brutality, a lot of stuff about what We should be doing to change in what change can come from. And again, I have no authority to speak on that. So what I do is I go to my man, Darryl here, who has a lifetime of service, not only to the nation, but to the police officers. Where does change come from? How does that how does that even worked out?

Darryl Rivers  17:19  
Well, I can tell you what defunding police is not going to fix the problem. It's going to create a whole nother problem. I just thought about this this morning, I was having a conversation with a radio personality. Actually a former news anchor. And a question rose, as far as you know, what is the one thing that you would advise citizens to do to change particular things? say well, if you're a good person, and you know, you, you, you have good moral standards and great core values. Join the police department. Because if you want to have really changed the police department become a cop man. You know, I mean, literally, this is probably and I look at law enforcement professionals and everything like that this should be the high time for recruitment and say, Look, we have problems. We need people who want to make change to join our agencies, and bring the change Be the change that you want to see. That's number one. Secondly, you know, we talked about this as far as the I want actions. And that is, is an acronym for I want is if we are not them. And what kind of actions do we produce? If we're not building? What we see the craziness, if we don't represent that, if they don't represent us, if we're not them? What do we do? So number one, number two thing I would say for law enforcement is to speak out, you know, say, hey, look, you know what, there's a small percentage of us that wear this badge. shouldn't wear it and we do not support them. And what ends up happening is that in that area, you begin to gain moral authority, as opposed to just your position, police officers position authority hasn't gone anywhere. But how far is positional authority controlling those riots? It's not. And the reason why those riots and protests are going on right now because moral authority has went in the tank. And in order to gain that moral authority back is to not defend Hey, we're good cops is to say, hey, look, I don't support that. I'm with you. I feel you I'd be upset to manufac I am upset and we don't support that. Those i think i think are two highlights on how change truly begins.

Rick A. Morris  19:39  
I love the I love the conversation about moral authority because if we look at if we parallel this to another universe, right if we look at the the Catholic Church and the the scandals that were going on, they're not all priests or do bad things to get right now, and they have a moral high ground as they should right what they're teaching is the right things just like please Officers are to keep the peace that's what they're supposed to do. They're supposed to protect us keep the peace. But now there's this thing of all priests do bad things to kids all cops are bad. How do we how do we start to really get around, in educate in and promote the 98% that are doing great things?

Damon Pampolina  20:18  
Well, that's huge, huge Rick.

Unknown Speaker  20:23  
So, sorry, yes. So for me, it is you need to you as an all of us, you as an everybody, we need to stop taking particular people and saying that those people represent the mass of all the others and do that with every single type of person. Because what happens is okay, here Look, the most racist thing anybody can ever say right now is black on black crime. And people don't understand how that term is racist. It's racist because you don't have people quoting white on white crime. Statistics, you don't have people quoting Asian or Asian crime statistics. So what we do is for the black and I'm saying black people, specifically not all people of color for black people, specifically what we do is we say, for these people, we can say that these few are the representation of everybody. So all of them are going to be bad. But for everybody else, let's not do that. So you have to do it across the board. And that's going to be tough for a lot of people because they have been institutionalized. There is an institution of European colonialism that has been going on for 700 years. And and this whole European colonialism has all been under the guise of God told us, this land is ours. And so to actually get to the root of it, we have to get to, yes, there are individual things that we need to do. There are group things that we need to do and we need to realize that when people We're talking about racism, they're talking about the individual racism and institutional racism. So you need to watch your mouth. Everybody needs to watch their mouth and see what they're saying and how they're saying it.

Rick A. Morris  22:14  
So that's one point a second. Okay, go ahead. You have another point.

Unknown Speaker  22:17  
Yeah, I want to get back to the defund the police. And this is another one of those sounds good. Might not be totally good from good intentioned people. You need to hear who's saying it is the poor people who get their doors knocked in, who get their families killed, with police that have guns that look like they're from some sci fi film, you know, and when they're saying defund the police. We also say, we've been defunding education for decades and screamed yet. Right and screamed a word about defunding education. But as soon as you say defund the police, oh, then it's on. And when we say defund the police, we're not What I'm saying when I, when I say defund the police, as I say some of those funds need to go to counselors and mentors that ride along with the police to give them an extra help. What I say when I say we need to defund the police, is they need to have better training, take those funds from they put on the guns and put it in their minds, put it in their pockets, so that so so so that the cops aren't hungry, pay him better. Make sure that when a police comes in, they've got a four year degree first, before they go into their six months into the academy and one and a half years. Make sure that within that four year degree, that they're getting sociology training, that they're getting a psychology training, that they're getting political science training, so defund the police for me doesn't mean take the money away from the police. It means reallocated so that the police can be more and better, efficient. I'll be quiet.

Rick A. Morris  24:02  
And I'll let Darryl come into that strong man. That's awesome. As a police officer here,

Unknown Speaker  24:06  
I can tell you right here now that this is, as a law enforcement officer and you go through a lot of different things, I believe the one thing that I have, I can say I'm going to invest money into the American police officer to build that person up in one particular area. I would say it has to be that person's mental well being. I truly believe that 90 plus percent of all officers enter into this particular profession with intention of saving the world at least I know I did. Okay. And my first four months I got into my first shoot out two months after that, I got my second shoot out. That changes a young man at 23 years old. Okay, you know, and and the thing is that I can't tell you how many in Detroit how many days bodies I've seen just driving down the street. Oh, here's a body. I can't tell you how many people I've talked to as they were taking their last breath and they died right there holding on to my pants leg saying where's the ambulance? I don't know how many there were. But I know one thing that did happen is that in my mind was began to be built. So that that doesn't drive me freakin insane. So what ends up happening is that the empathy of the American officer begins to dissipate with all of the craziness and chaos that he's constantly being exposed to. So now when another officer is thumping on someone, that empathy isn't there, because I've spent years seeing horrible crap that I built walls up around my heart and my so I can actually go home and hug my kids. So I can actually go home and have a normal relationship with my friends. And I think that the human race is 100% crap. Because no one calls 911 when they're having a good day. They say I'm having a worst day, I'm a life coach, I need you to come deal with it. And you're going after you're meeting people every single day, worst day, they're like, worst day they're like worse. They're like worse. They're like, and then you get people who want to fight you, then you get people who run from you. And you get people say, Hey, I got nothing to do with that. But you can help me solve this problem. So you're dealing with all of these problems. So if there's one thing that I can say will be totally beneficial, is investing in a person's emotional well being now I've been into unfortunately, I've had to discharge my firearm in the line of duty. And afterwards, what they do is you go see a psychologist, and they want to know of you. They just want to know if you're fit to go back out on the street, do they give you three days off, and they want to make sure that you're not PTSD. And that's it. That's it. That is the problem. We get desensitized, we become cynical and empathy goes out of the window, and that needs to change.

Rick A. Morris  26:58  
And we're gonna stop right there for a break, but I do have to make a side comment here, Darryl, knowing what you've been through and all that stuff. You are one of my favorite people on the planet. There's not a single time that you and I have a conversation that we don't laugh, when I have a good time when you support each other, and to know that you've come through that to be the person that you are. I have the most tremendous respect and love for you rather just none other. You're just an amazing person. We're going to take a break right here we'll be right back with the work life balance.

VoiceAmerica  27:32  
Are you frustrated with the overall productivity of your project management processes? Do you lack consistency and project delivery? Our squared consulting provides end to end services to assist companies of all sizes in realizing and improving the value of project management. Whether you want to build a project management office, train project managers or learn how to bring the oversight and governance to your project processes. r squared has tailored better practices to help you in all areas of project management, visit r squared consulting.com are you getting the most out of your project management software? In many cases, it is not the software that is failing but the implementation limitations or processes surrounding the use of that software. r squared can analyze your current use and help improve your return on investment. r squared can also suggest the best software for your organization and goals and assist in the selection implementation and training. Allow r square to ensure that you are getting the value of your investment visit r squared consulting.com today.

When it comes to business, you'll find the experts here

voice America business network.

You are tuned in to the work life balance. To reach Rick Morris or his guest today. We'd love to have Call into the program at 1-866-472-5790. Again, that's 1-866-472-5790. If you'd rather send an email, Rick can be reached at our Morris at r squared consulting.com. Now back to the work life balance.

Rick A. Morris  29:19  
And we're back on this Friday edition very special edition of the work life balance is we're having an honest conversation about what's going on right now. And about race and how to talk to each other. How to come through it, and I'm going to give the next question to Damon, go ahead.

Damon Pampolina  29:34  
Yeah. As a citizen, you know, you see the situation and hindsight 2020 there were spectators that witnessed Mr. George Floyd George Floyd's passing and maybe it's it's tough man, but maybe it's someone was more busy calling 911 or screaming for help. Is something of this nature instead of just filming it? This, maybe this man could still be alive. Daryl, I'll give it to you, man. What do you think as far as a citizen, if you know that we just, God forbid, happens again? All of our citizens out there listening, what could they maybe do? You know, you listen, you got to give the authority to the cops. So they couldn't probably bum rush them or get on top of the officer that was doing that. But what could maybe have been done?

Unknown Speaker  30:30  
Right on? Great question. Number one, I want to say is, do you want to make a point or do you want to save someone's life? And I think sometimes, you know, when the yelling and the screaming and everything, let me tell you something, it's been many times to where it's I've been at a scene and I get people yelling, screaming, leave him alone. He didn't do anything. You know what that does, to me. That brings my vigilance all the way up to one right, because now I don't only have to deal with the person I'm dealing with. I mean, I got a mob of people out here that I might have to deal with as well. Okay, and let me tell you Something one thing that just about every law enforcement officer thinks that they're right. Honestly, when they're doing what they're doing, they feel like they're right. And when you got everyone else surrounding you and yelling and screaming at you, it's gonna cause your bills, your vigilance to shoot to the top. So one thing I would say is, yeah, if you have the opportunity to record record because now you you, you can put that out to the world. But your number one thing that you do need to do is turn it from officer problem to a is turning from a police officer problem to a police department problem. And when I say that when when an individual is fighting someone or something like that, that's a one on one police officer problem. But when you call 911, it says, Hey, I am witnessing a police officer being you know, overly aggressive with the handcuffed individual. Now, that's a police department problem. Now is that police department's responsibility to send someone else out there so that cooler heads can prevail. And you You need to go ahead and stop the recording to make that call. You want to save that person's life? Now, a lot of times you say, oh, we'll just jumped on them and stop them, you would have been shot. Because that, you know, you would have been shot. You know, just honestly, you know, if I'm arresting someone and I get a mob of people jumping on me, number one knows that people want to go home. You know, so call 911 have have other officers get there because of the police officers who are there aren't doing their job, as far as handling the situation appropriately called call someone else that probably will, because I'm gonna take that department, is it full of people that think like that? So Darryl,

Rick A. Morris  32:38  
well, and on that note, go ahead, do a

Damon Pampolina  32:41  
quick quick, quick question, Darrell. It may be and I know this would be a very rough estimate for you, but it would be great to hear from someone in your position. All of our listeners out there. What do you think two percentages of corrupt cops, you know, so that they can understand that yeah, that this is such a minute part of the department and we don't want to Start this outrage of hating all these cops. Like you said, there's so many great ones out there that love their jobs. What are we 2%? What do we said, you know, Rick keeps talking about the 98%. Does that sound fair?

Darryl Rivers  33:11  
It sounds fair. So Damon, let me let me let me provide a couple of quick divisions here, okay. 2% are probably corrupt. 10% shouldn't be cops. So just because you shouldn't be a cop doesn't mean that you're corrupt. God, you know, so so when I look at corruption, I'm thinking of criminals. You know, a certain people who are okay. do certain people shouldn't be cops, they should have never been hired, period. You know, they're not going to do a good job. They're not going to you know, they're not going to fulfill the duties of a law enforcement professional period. You know, some people have no empathy whatsoever. Some people are so nonchalant. You know, they're like, Hey, I get a police call about people fighting. Like, I'm just going to take my time. By the time I get there, they'll be tired and I don't have to fight people. They are not corrupt, but that person shouldn't be a cop. And then you get the person who's zero. They're to say, Oh hell yeah, I get to fight someone today. Well, yeah, I want you to zoom there, but I don't want you to have that intention. That person shouldn't be a cop. So it's a higher percentage of people who shouldn't be cops. But as far as corrupt, I will say about 2% I think that you and Rick are correct on a 98% of cops are inherently good.

Rick A. Morris  34:22  
So I want to I want to bring two comments kind together. In our boy Wayne Brady in Wayne, is his you know, dear friend somebody I look up to as well he did an hour and 45 minute Instagram a couple of weeks ago or last week I believe that my daughter actually shared with me as well and he said something was really profound for me so Winston, I'm gonna dovetail your comment here and ask for it but you know, you were talking about black I'm saying black on black crime, very racist thing to say. But it is a go to when somebody says Black Lives Matter, right. So when somebody goes a black lives matter, the first thing they want to go as well. What about black on black crime and they start quoting statistics about, you know, all that other kind of stuff in Wayne actually said the way he said it he said, You know what? I'm not going to discuss that not that it's not an issue or something that we should discuss he goes, but the police are the people we call when we need help. And I thought that was a really, really profound way to to belay that argument, which is a standard mainstream kind of argument, but I wanted you to kind of comment on that with with the understanding of the of the police side.

Winston Price  35:29  
Yeah, and

Unknown Speaker  35:31  
that's the thing. They don't help me. You know, when I'm thinking about the people of the community, the police don't help me. They only come around when they want to fill their quota. You know, so where I grew up in Indianapolis brightwood for six to one eight. Across the street from me was the crack house. You know, you talk about you know, driving by and seeing the body on the on the ground. I literally went to go take the trash And one of my best friends was in his trunk with his hands cut off. The police don't help me. I don't call the police When I need help. I don't call the police. And so there's this idea that's that some people have, once again been institutionalized that the police are helpful to all they aren't. They take 10 to 20 minutes to get to someplace. So if my daughter's being raped, the police ain't gonna help me. My daughter needs to help herself. If I'm getting robbed in my store, I'm gonna be robbed before the police get there. And so there's this romanticized idealism of the police. People just need to wipe out and police need to wipe that out of their heads to you're not the Savior. You're not the court. The police are not the court. The police are not the court one more time, the police are not the court. And when the police go out there, and they start to make people guilty before they're innocent. That's the other problem. So for me, for a person that the police don't help. I'm not sure what else to say to that, to that point, because the police don't help me. And that's how a lot of people feel.

Rick A. Morris  37:11  
So Darryl, you want to come in on that?

Darryl Rivers  37:13  
Absolutely. Um, when it comes to that, when people say, Oh, well, you know, Black Lives Matter, but what about black on black crime? Well, the law doesn't dictate that I gotta submit, or provide authority to my neighbor. It's as simple as that, you know, the law says, I have to submit to law enforcement, you tell me I got to submit to this person. You know, they stop, I have to stop. But they, you know, whatever is certain laws that are afforded to law enforcement that aren't afforded to the regular citizen. So people can say, Oh, well, yeah, black on black crime if black lives don't matter, because look at Black on Black crime.

You know,

that is, like I said, it's a very invalid statement.

But I think the main thing is that

Unknown Speaker  38:06  
I don't have laws that stay when an individual in my neighborhood or whatever the case may be is requesting information from me or are they pull up their car behind me? And you know, they have lights on. I don't have to submit I don't have to stop. But of law enforcement do it. I have to do this you heat there have been empowered with certain authorities that regular citizens have not been. And I don't think the question is about the black on black crime or anything like that. The real question is, okay, who are you empowering? You know, and that's the main theme that I believe when people go there with the whole you know, what about black on black crime and then the rebuttal is, you know, like you said, You know, I don't feel like a please help me or, you know, because I'm sure a lot of people feel that way. I've talked to people People who straight up say I can't stand the police. And you know, my normal response is do it sometime. I can't either. I still need your driver's license. To do sometimes I can't either. But if you cooperate with me, I promise you, I will call any more of them here. And we're both of you in a better place. You know, and

Unknown Speaker  39:21  
yeah, and that's kind of my issue with this question situation, it's not actually focusing on the actual problem. The actual problem is, is the person saying black on black is trying to take away from the situation and get us removed from what's going on, and they're using the black on black to also state, that person should have been murdered. They're trying to give examples of why this person should have been murdered and why these things happen. They're not trying to actually help anything. Anytime somebody says well, black on black, you are a part of the European colonial white supremacist institution because you are doing extracting from the problem. You're trying to keep the institution

Rick A. Morris  40:04  
the way it is. It's a deflection for sure. And so we're going to go to our final break here, but just try to swing us up into a more positive mood. And then I've got a doozy of a question for you at this. But Michael J, the way he says it, I don't know if anybody has caught his routine. But when you hear pushback on Black Lives Matter, he goes, the words matter. He goes, it's we matter. I don't think we're having this really big. Because we haven't we started too low with the word itself. It wasn't Black Lives are Supreme, it's just that they matter. I thought that was a really, really, really good take, especially to do that. So we're gonna continue this conversation. We're gonna take our final break right here you're listening to the work life balance with Rick Morris.

VoiceAmerica  40:57  
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You are tuned in to the work life balance to reach Rick Morris or his guest today, we'd love to have you call into the program at 1-866-472-5790. Again, that's 1-866-472-5790 if you'd rather send an email Rick can be reached at our Morris at r squared consulting.com Now back to the work life balance.

Rick A. Morris  42:43  
And we're back with our final segment of the work life balance really really diving in on honest conversation. I feel like we could have done a six hour show and not run out of material. There's so much to talk about here but one of the things I've noticed quite a bit. Is is the not only you know one of the big things we We should be doing is acknowledging white privilege and talking about white privilege. But there's a lot of people apologizing specifically to black people apologizing for their white privilege. And I wanted to see Winston, we'll start with you. Have you had that experience? And what? Tell me about that tell me if that was how that makes you feel, and does that even work?

Unknown Speaker  43:20  
So, in my experience, the intent has moved me to tears. Again, really, really good intentions. These are people who are for them empathizing. Now also I say, I don't want your guilt. That is a negative thing. You know, it's nice that you feel this way. Take all that energy you have with all that guilt, and then give me some internal actions. Show me what you're doing. So, again, it has moved me to tears. I have Facebook posts from inboxes that I've had of people just like once now, you've you shone a light on things, you know, and it's warm and it makes me feel so good.

Winston Price  44:12  
Take that energy, internalize it, and then do something with it. I'll leave it there. Darryl.

Unknown Speaker  44:21  
Right on. You say basically, how does it feel? Um, I've had people say, hey, well, you know, uh, you know, you're my brother. And you know, and I know that and the people who I talked to, I have no doubt in my mind that that's what their position is. But I think in general, when that statement is said, I'm apologizing for white privilege or something to that effect. I believe that it's well known that that people of color African Americans in the United States cannot fix the problem. We can't fix the problem. And just like any country, that that may fall under attack or anything like that, they look for allies. And no one's going to invade certain countries who has strong allies. And when when individuals who are being, you know, I would say targeted or discriminated against or no press, when they begin to build powerful allies, the or press soars think twice about attempting to oppress. So when I hear the I apologize for white privilege, what I'm actually hearing is, I'm sorry, I wasn't a better ally. And I didn't speak out as I didn't use my platform, or I didn't say, Hey, you know what, that's not cool. You know, I need to speak out about this on a bigger scale. That's what I hear. You know, and as Winston said, yeah, it's heartfelt, you know, because they really mean it. I know it 100% so yeah, that's just my outlook on that. That's how I view it.

Rick A. Morris  45:56  
Damon, you have any comments brother?

Unknown Speaker  45:58  
Well, what I'm getting From Winston and Darryl, it's funny because no matter what the subject matter is, it usually always gets down to the fundamentals. And the fundamentals on this subject, like a lot of things in life is walk the walk, talk the talk. I personally, you know, you brought up in the beginning of the episode about coming up and making the statement, you know, I have black friends and you know, I'm cool with that. It's like, it doesn't even need to be said if it's, if it's a genuine feeling. You don't even need to say it right, like your actions, your respect what you do. So, just walk the walk. Like you're saying, that's, that's what I've got from, from this episode today that the main thing is, man, show it, prove it. And everything else is kind of irrelevant. And then the words are kind of irrelevant, you know? So, yeah, you just just just, if it's pure, and you are that individual, it will resonate. People will see it and then that's it. You know, every else does it really is kind of irrelevant. But boy Have I got a great education today, Rick, this was awesome. Man. I just really appreciate you having me on with these two other gentlemen, this was great. Well, again, you guys,

Rick A. Morris  47:11  
you guys have been trusted confidant of mine for years. People I look up to, you know when when difficult things happen we seek counsel, but I also want to make sure that the counsel I'm getting are from people that I look up to, not to people that look up to me if that makes sense in so you guys all fit that bill. And we've just got a few minutes left. Before this is is wrapped up. But what I want to do is just kind of give it a roundtable so we'll go Daryl Winston and Damon and I'll wrap it up. But let's just each kind of take a minute and whatever message you want to send whatever's on your heart, however we feel like we can wrap up this conversation. And for anybody who's listening, what's advice that you would would give them so Darryl, we'll start with you partner.

Darryl Rivers  47:55  
Right on man number one. I appreciate you man. Love you much, brother. And thanks for having me. On with, you know, with a such a great panel of individuals. My number one thing is man, don't expect you from everyone else. You know, we're acting like hey, well, why isn't this person speaking up and why isn't that person speaking up? They are speaking up by maintaining their silence they tell you where they stand. And we have to call them right differentiation saying that's not us. We are not them that stuff is going on here we are not they may have actions to prove it. So number one that I will say and I say this all the time. I don't have to tell you your car is dirty and filthy. I just got to shine the hell out of mind and park right next to you people that get the point. So when you actually are here walking the walk and you're doing your theme, those who are in folly will be recognized and leave it at that often.

Unknown Speaker  48:50  
Yeah, so don't impede the process. Make sure you're not using the one liners whenever I hear someone say I have a black friend. I go mysoginists marry women all the time you have a black friend doesn't mean you're not racist.

Winston Price  49:09  
So,

Unknown Speaker  49:11  
right. So just like Darryl said, just like we're saying, live it every day. It's not a it's not a one day thing. It's for its for the rest of your life until you die. When I walk out of this house, I need to be aware of what every woman thinks about me because of what every woman has gone through in her life. And I need to empathize with that every day of my life. When I walk out, and I see elder people, I need to realize that they've been through a lot of a lot of things in their lives with elder abuse and elder care issues. So I need to realize that there are so many different bad things going on for so many different people. I need to go out and shine my car. I need to be that bright light, as Darryl says, so that other people can see the light. I'll be quiet. My brother.

Damon Pampolina  50:01  
Yeah, basic fundamentals man come from a place of respect, right? It's It's so simple, but yet seems to get lost. And I'm hoping that this, this man's death was not in vain. Again, here we are in 2020 still dealing with this, it kind of blows my mind. But nevertheless, learn from it come from a place of respect. And Rick, we talked about this, which is what you're doing today, which is awesome is communication, communication, key, communicate, talk, do not be scared to ask those questions so that you can learn, and you can correct them moving forward, whatever that may mean, in this platform, right. But communication, which is what you did for us today, Rick, which is awesome. You had a great panel on and everybody's communicating what a concept.

Rick A. Morris  50:47  
Well, and I can't thank all of you enough. This actually kind of all happened at the last minute. So you know, I started reaching out, people jumped in Winston and I had a conversation last week that that really started this and so just individually Really quickly, I already said what I feel about you, Darryl, earlier, Winston is when when I was approached to do this radio show almost five years ago now. I was kind of blown it off at first and I was supposed to have like a 20 minute conversation with Winston, I think we were on the phone for three and a half, four hours. And I've been friends ever since. And I appreciate and love you and Damon you and I go way back, as well and love your energy that that that you can bring to any situation. So I appreciate that. I think my final words here is you know, this was my platform. This is my opportunity to try to start a conversation which is all I was asking to do. What I asked for everybody out there is to be able to have a pure conversation to be to be unafraid to call you know, I was unafraid to call Darryland say Darryl, this is what I'm feeling helped me understand why I'm feeling this way. Is it okay. You know, Darryl and I talked briefly I had a very brief incident where I was almost jumped just solely for the the Color My Skin I've walked through the wrong place. And I said, you know, that was one instance one feeling that I can hold on to what I remember that fear, which is something that you know is probably a 1,000th of the times that Darryl or Winston has felt that way. And so I can I understand that feeling but I still don't feel like I can empathize. And I think that that's a really important part for us to understand is we honestly can never know. I can honestly never know Darryl and Winston what you feel what you've gone through. All I can do is listen and be your friend. When you need me and Daryl I will tell you this. You have an ally in me every day of the week for for eternity brother. I'm with you. Winston the same Damon the same. Again, gang. Thank you so much for allowing us to have this conversation and gracing this platform. All the people on Facebook Live all the people listening all the people that will hear this on a podcast. We thank you and you can always Tune in next week. For the work life balance, thank you so much. Have a great week. Brother.

VoiceAmerica  53:08  
Thank you for joining us this week. The work life balance with Rick Morris can be heard live every Friday at 2pm pacific time and 5pm eastern time on The Voice America business channel. Now that the weekend is here, it's time to rethink your priorities and enjoy it. We'll see you on our next show.