Saturday, May 2, 2020

Turn Your Life Around - Inge Rock

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VoiceAmerica  0:04  
One problem facing people at many levels of business is how to make time for a work life and a personal life. Do you find that one seems to keep getting in the way of the other? This is the work life balance with Rick Morris. Even if you're not involved in the business world, you'll have a lot to gain by tuning into today's show. Now, here's your host, Rick A. Morris,

Rick A. Morris  0:26  
and welcome to a new edition of the work life balance. So excited to have everybody along. We've got everything all set up. And I've actually got a fantastic guest. It's a repeat guest. It's a it's a dear friend of mine from the john Maxwell team. And I think she and I both are kind of caged animals right now in the sense that we're used to traveling and visiting with people and inspiring audiences and being on stage and in now stuck, you know, 50 plus days in our homes. I think we're going a little I'll be honest, we're just gonna go batshit crazy, I think is what we're doing at the end of the day, but But let's bring her on the show. No need to introduce her to the rest of the audience. We got tons of stuff on there from before but let's bring Ingo rock on how you doing.

Inge Rock  1:07  
Hi Rick. Very well How about yourself?

Rick A. Morris  1:11  
doing fantastic. You know the first time we met I think you were dancing on stage leading leading the original dance crew for the for the john Maxwell team.

Inge Rock  1:20  
years ago.

Rick A. Morris  1:21  
Yeah. When did you join the team?

Inge Rock  1:23  
Right from the beginning.

Rick A. Morris  1:25  
So your founding member?

Inge Rock  1:27  
Yeah, I think the second group,

Rick A. Morris  1:29  
second group, Okay, fair enough. It's close enough. Right? Well,

Inge Rock  1:31  
I think the years Frankly,

Rick A. Morris  1:34  
I have to count the coins. You know, when they asked me how many MCs you've been through. I have to count the coins. I'd have no idea.

Man,

Inge Rock  1:43  
heartbroken when we when we canceled due to COVID this last piece yet. But anyway, we're here to discuss you. You've got a new book, right? How exciting. You've got a new book. Good and tell him what the title is.

Yes, the title is turn your life around.

been released in Belgium in Dutch, which is my primary language and last December, and now we're launching the English version

Rick A. Morris  2:10  
outstanding. And you're also starting to come stateside a little bit more as well talk about,

Inge Rock  2:16  
expect that. Well, you know, everything we did over the last 13 years grew organically. You know, people were just pulling my sleeve and saying, hey, when can I join your team? When can I work with you? When can you help me grow my business, etc. And so we brought people in from the states from the UK from Curacao, which is convenient because they also speak Dutch. from everywhere, actually. And so the team is growing, and I'm really looking forward to hop over as soon as we can, and start doing seminars in the States. Yes.

Rick A. Morris  2:57  
Well, yeah, that that's what we're all waiting for. We're kind of ready to jump ready to go. But talk to me a little bit about this. I mean, when did you know and what inspired you really to a write the book but what what's kind of the story of turning your life around?

Inge Rock  3:12  
My story started about 15 years ago, when my life collapsed, just you know, complete turmoil. I lost everything. Once my marriage lost my business, my self confidence state with 1 million euro of debt, which was crazy. And I remember then one morning it was very cold, freezing snow. And there was nothing much to do and I was thinking this is this it? Is there something more. So somewhere in my soul, something was stirring, but I had no clue. So I came into a bookstore and I found the legendary book, you can heal your life by Louise Eliot. I bought the book and I remember I was thinking, well, if this is any good, like fire with it today. And that was a start. That was the turning point. And now I wrote the book in Dutch It is my second book in English is my second. But I wrote it because I see so many people being stuck and wondering, Is this it? Or is there something more? And if there's something more, how do I find it? How do I connect with what's truly there for me? So that is the purpose of the book to bring answers to that and inspire people to actually,

Rick A. Morris  4:37  
I think there's really kind of two levels to that, right. There's the people that are kind of, I'm stuck, but I'm unaware that I'm stuck, essentially. Right. Or that I'm stuck. And I'm aware that I'm stuck, but I don't know what to do to kind of get out of that.

Inge Rock  4:50  
Yeah. So you have practical advice for that in the book? Absolutely. Yes. We look at different angles. And I Well, every book, I write is a self help book, but also workbook. I'm a coach, I ask questions, right? So I cannot write a book without asking questions and people and giving people assignments so they can become aware of what they truly want, and what is the voice inside of them that is still like locked up? And how do I gain more and more clarity? You know, before they make the turn, of course, and yes, there are also people, you know, who have been knocked down like I was 15 years ago, actually, I knew already for four years that I had to change my life around. But you know, I was stuck in the comfort zone and afraid to change, afraid, you know, to lose what I had and eventually lost everything. And I realized that that was four years too late. So it doesn't have to be painful. As soon as you come become aware of it, and you realize that, you know, you become emotional, emotional and you're not satisfied that maybe you cannot put your finger on it. That's the time that you start to think. And and yeah, I think there is no way back then.

Rick A. Morris  6:08  
And I think there's something that I'm hearing more and more to is, you know, I feel nothing. So it's not not stuck in unaware it's not stuck and aware. It's it's assessing the current relationship and saying that there's literally I feel nothing in this relationship. There's no emotion whatsoever. It's just kind of going through the motions. So when Do people really begin to realize it's time to change?

Inge Rock  6:39  
People start to realize, actually, this is a good time. You know, there's lots of this with COVID-19 is people are stuck. Many people don't have a job, you know, are locked up in their homes just like I am now. 50 plus things and a lot of people ask themselves questions because regular life stops. But as soon as you know you're, most of the time you're in a place by yourself can be sitting on the restroom, I mean, or living in bath or whatever. And then that little voice comes and says What are you doing? Why are you doing this? Who are you doing this for? You know, these are the subtle questions that come forward and make you think like, Okay, I gotta do this for the rest of my life Am I gonna stay in this relationship are no less of my life and that I'm going to live here for the rest of my life. Because it's in many areas. It's not only career or business can be relationships can be the place where you live, there's so many elements, and even stuck in your own body. It can be like, I'm going to live like this for the rest of my life. And it doesn't have to be midlife crisis. I think You've had many different levels. But when the questions come forward, you've had to pay attention to it and you sit and, you know, just let come whatever comes allow the voice to come forward. I think that's important.

Rick A. Morris  8:16  
And I think you said it earlier. I think you're right in the sense of with COVID-19, we've cleared out the distractions and a lot of people are forced. One of my favorite sayings is AI, activity doesn't equal achievement, right? We can be really busy doing a bunch of stuff that means nothing. And when you there's people that convince themselves that they're super happy, because they're the ones doing the bake sale, and they're taking all the kids to sports, and they're, they're immersed in activity to prove to them and now that you've stripped all that away, you're just kind of left with you at the core. And I think this is a really interesting time. I love the fact that you said it's a perfect time to start looking introspectively I think it's the time where people start realize, Oh no, like, What do I do? Like? Who am I? The day, right?

Inge Rock  9:07  
Yes, because we copy and paste our dates. We copy paste the day of today towards tomorrow. And it goes on and on and on. And eventually years passed by and people look back and saying, Oh my gosh, what did I do for the last 567 10 years, and now it all stops, you know, and we cannot copy paste our life like, you know, we are creatures of habit, when habits stop, we get challenged. And then if the regular job is not there, and you know, as you say, taking the kids to sports, etc, everything stops. So now we have to time into space and think which is very confronting for many, many people, by the way. But on one hand, I think at least there is a space there's a void that we can start to fill with something That is way more interesting and way more fulfilling. I think that's important too.

Rick A. Morris  10:05  
And I think the most successful people right now, too are actually using this time to set up. Yeah, I talked about emergence. That's a big thing. Mm hmm. We're gonna come out of this, we're going to pop out of this COVID cocoon and life is going to get back together. But the people that are planning for emergence now versus just planning, you know, what am I going to do? What am I going to stream on Netflix tomorrow? Right? I think those are the people that are really gonna have an opportunity to explode coming out of this.

Inge Rock  10:36  
Yes, of course, because you see, also for instance, in this course, people are still numbing themselves with baking cookies and drinking to lunch and sporting too much, etc, running away from themselves. But then there are people just like you and me and we take time to evaluate and, and to really ask ourselves, how can we add more value? I think that's a big thing. In my book, I didn't I speak a lot about ambition and significance. You know, our good friend says once you've tasted significant significant success will never be enough by Yeah, exactly. So yeah, I, for instance, one of my dear clients is CEO of a very large public publicity company. He called me last week and he said, I'm not going back. I just can't, I just can't I I'd be lying to myself. I have four sports car but I have no time to drive them. You know? And okay, maybe that is one example and for everybody of us is going to emerge in a different way. But I think it's very natural and very healthy when it comes for.

Rick A. Morris  11:46  
He said, You know, people like you and me, but I do have to make a confession. I've been cooking my tail off 80 pounds on this, but I, I loved to cook and just at the time to do it. And now you know, I've changed some Circumstances and I'm cooking every night and it's a good time. Maybe not cookies, but we're cooking. Speaking of cooking, we're gonna continue with English.

Inge Rock  12:11  
Yes, exactly.

Exactly. I love it.

Rick A. Morris  12:16  
We're gonna go ahead and take a quick break here. We'll be right back with him directly listening to Rick Morris on the work life balance.

VoiceAmerica  12:25  
Are you frustrated with the overall productivity of your project management processes? Do you lack consistency and project delivery? Our squared consulting provides end to end services to assist companies of all sizes in realizing and improving the value of project management. Whether you want to build a project management office, train project managers or learn how to bring the oversight and governance to your project processes. r squared has tailored best practices to help you in all areas of project management, visit r squared consulting.com Are you getting the most out of your project management software. In many cases, it is not the software that is failing but the implementation limitations or processes surrounding the use of that software. r squared can analyze your current use and help improve your return on investment. r squared can also suggest the best software for your organization and goals and assist in the selection implementation and training. Allow r square to ensure that you are getting the value of your investment visit r squared consulting.com today from the boardroom to you, voice America business network.

You are tuned in to the work life balance to reach Rick A. Morris or his guest today we'd love to have you call into the program at 1-866-472-5790. Again, that's 186647257 At nine zero, if you'd rather send an email, Rick can be reached at our Morris at r squared consulting.com. Now back to the work life balance.

Rick A. Morris  14:10  
And we're back to the work life balance on this Friday afternoon visiting with my good friend in Iraq all the way in Belgium thank goodness for zoom and connection and all those things that we've been talking about the her latest book, which has turned your life around, but just in general, talking about what Inka does, and you know, a lot of people, I'm gonna speak for the United States as much as I can not that I can accompany the whole, you know, 350 million people. But I find it very difficult for people to accept or understand that there's not a negative stigma with coaching. Like people think that when I when I talk to clients, about coaching, they go, Oh, all of my people need that. But I'm good. Like I don't, I'm awesome. I'm good. I don't need it in I'm wondering what your experience is like that in different countries. And then also, are there some cultural influences on that? For instance, you know, Pura vida, we were talking about that in Costa Rica was life changing for me, but I've never culturally met. Again, just consistently, those people were so hungry, to hear about leadership to hear about values to hear about how they could personally take accountability for growth. And then I came back to the United States and it I mean, it's almost like I don't need this. So tell me a little bit about why is it so hard for people to change and why do they have that negative stigma against coaching?

Inge Rock  15:39  
Yeah, you know, coaching started from the world of sports years ago, and that is obvious. We all know that. You know, football players have coaches and runners have coaches so obvious and it's normal. But once coaching entered into the mainstream, people were afraid because you know, and I know there's also a big cultural difference between America and Central Europe or I come from, like, when I watch movies, everybody has a goal, not in your, you know, you must be really out of your mind when you need to shrink and for, you know, the us when we see that in movies, and that's all that I can relate to, of course, it's like it's so normal. But you know, we're still like in a niche of the market, I think, I believe I strongly believe and I watch a couple of very influential people around the world in different in different areas. And I believe people are waking up all around the globe now. And I think this COVID-19 periods really, you know, empowered that in some way. And I believe that there will never be a time like before COVID-19 and then there will be after COVID-19 i think it's it's really going to be a difference. I think Don't think we go back to normal? I don't think so. So since the world is speeding up, and we only have 24 hours in a day, and we all have our minds, and we all these impressions, you know, like 10 years ago, we had like, 1000 1500 impressions a day. Now we have 15,000. How do you cope with that? How do you deal with that? We see burnout figures going up global, you know, and yes, there are corners in the world when that doesn't count, because they don't have the Western culture like we have. But whenever I travel, and of course, I speak in in western countries. Yes, there are cultural differences. But in general, it's all the same, a lot of stress and a lot of burdens because we don't have the coping mechanism and the resilient mindset to deal with it. So I believe that you know, the the paradigms around coaching and a fear around coaching is going to be lifted somehow. But I also think it still will need some time. But I somehow I think it will become more mainstream in general in general no 17% of people worldwide and then of course, we're talking again, us. I think the big five and Europe 70% of people are using coaching in some way. Um, do I still see cultural differences? Sure. But it is more in the, you know, in the personality of the people like when I come to Poland, oh my god, there's so intense. You know, the audience all the time when I'm speaking, the audience is super quiet until the conference is over. And then they jump around my neck and they kiss me and hug me and they want 10,000 pictures and then my clothes need to Go to the dry clean car ride Foundation, the lipstick and, you know, yes, there are, of course, these kind of cultural differences. I'm married to a crow that so that kids do and I come in Croatia, it's the same kind of, you know, the same kind of vibe. But when it comes to personal growth and coaching and personal development, I see I see the same kind of things happening. And you know, Rick, when I come to the IMC and I'm sitting with people at the table from all over the globe, they all say the same. I country need this country need this and then I smile because I know. And probably every country needs it in a little bit in a different way. That awareness is awareness. You know, I believe that the whole world is waking up.

Rick A. Morris  19:54  
Yeah, I asked this question to a guest of mine previously, the answer was my Job's not to convince you you need coaching is to inspire you. Oh, I loved I love that line. But it's, I think a lot of it comes from fear. Oh, yeah. And so, I know that when I really, really started to invest in my personal growth journey, very similar story in the sense that writing hi just, you know, did like 1.9 or 2.1 million in profit for the year my biggest year ever, but I came out depressed, burned out. questioning if this was what I was going to do, and I almost lost everything. I literally had negotiate my house. And that's when I started my personal growth journey. I hit my leadership lit This is essentially what happened I hit the lid. I don't think I hit it. I think I crushed through it. It broke me in all different things. I mean, it was really hard lid. And so I started the personal growth journey and I've noticed my relationship changing in in terms of there's people who refuse to grow And who don't like the fact that I'm growing? And I think that there's a fear that I don't know if it's like stems from like the 70s, you know, the 70s, when all the self help really started to come out, and it has kind of a negative connotation that this album was like, and so we're promoting that it's very much self help, right. But it, it's just we've got to change and overcome that stigma, to get people to understand that, and we don't have the answers. Our job is to get the answers out of you.

Inge Rock  21:30  
Yeah.

Yeah, absolutely. You know, what, what is really typical, and then I'm speaking for Europe. Religions collapsed. Yeah. You see that, you know, 10 years ago, the whole Catholic Church collapsed somehow and people are searching, you know, the inner voice is still there. People are searching for, you know, what's the purpose of life? What am I doing here? And also communities. That's what I love so much about them. Back to state, your communities are so strong and that is something that we Europeans can learn a lot from. Because we need each other, you know, we need each other, we need to help each other, empower each other. Because the world is negative enough by itself. If you look at the masses, the masses are still you know, angry at the world and add themselves and so these are people that maybe we don't retrain them yet, but somehow I believe that yeah, if we can get beyond the resistance, I think it's, it's a lot of resistance. And of course, resistance is a form of fever once with people and that's why I do you know, so many free stuff also like like webinars and and free seminars, because I want to touch people, people's heart, I want to, you know, speaking to their souls, so they see that there is nothing strange or weird about it, and usually About the 70s I think we go 400 years back in Europe. We go, if we go back to Newtonian physics and Darwinian physics was, like 200 years ago, we were always that the smart, the rich, you know, the powerful, the influential, they can make their life. But if you're not the smartest kid in the class, too bad, you know, you're not gonna make it, you're just gonna be average. And honestly, that's what I thought. I wasn't the best student in school. I was just average. So I thought, you know what, my life is going to be average. And that is a huge paradigm. Global paradigm because I hear the same wherever I come in. It comes time that we move to quantum physics instead of Newtonian physics. But in order to move and to make that transition Lot of paradigms have to fall have to collapse. And people need tons of education to understand who they are and who they are. Not only from a religious point of view because I see that people who have faith, find a lot of power there and a lot of conference which is awesome. But I see so many people here around me without feet. So, you know, they start searching and they start reading in somehow, you know, they will find the connection to a higher self to a higher purpose, I'm sure.

Rick A. Morris  24:35  
Yeah. When I first really heard of Koba, you know what, I'll just, again, bear directly to john Maxwell team. When I first came to training. I was super excited to hear from karate, super excited, you know, to hear from Paul and of course of john. You know, Ed was there at the time. I felt like going into the session. I was like, I am here because I have to be here. With Kristian Simpson, okay and he rocked my world I mean he brought me to tears and so I think the coaching process is something every leader needs to at least go through whether they're trying to be coached or not. Because that that you know if you give somebody the answer you robbed them of a lifetime of learning when when Kristin hit me with that, everything just kind of crystallized clear to me. And so it was funny I've told Kristen this and you know, he's become a dear friend since he and I were scraping paint together in Costa Rica. But it's that I went in with this mentality that I was going to get the least value and then I found the most value just because I had the bar set so low, you know, it said so low and Christian, so amazing. But the juggling thing was just so crystal clear to me of what and I love the fact in to clue people in, don't want to give away the exercise, but they asked us to do something in this case juggling that we we all regularly Don't do and some of us can do some they can't. But they have as coach the other person. And what's hilarious is me. Again, I'll speak personally, I could not juggle. And here I am telling this person how to juggle, like I'm some famous circus clown that knows how to do it. That to me was brilliant. So, I'm running up against a blank break here. But what I want to get into when we come back is that coaching process itself, why we think every leader really needs to go through it. And then how does a person really kind of start to lose some of those paradigms that you were talking about? false beliefs? Yeah, they believe in and I think that's really kind of the key is, is we keep telling ourselves lies and believing them all the time. We're gonna get into that right after the break. We're here with Ingo rock you're listening to Rick Morris and the work life balance.

VoiceAmerica  26:57  
Are you frustrated with the overall productivity of Your project management processes Do you lack consistency and project delivery? Our squared consulting provides end to end services to assist companies of all sizes and realizing and improving the value of project management. Whether you want to build a project management office, train project managers, or learn how to bring the oversight and governance to your project processes. r squared has tailored best practices to help you in all areas of project management, visit r squared consulting.com are you getting the most out of your project management software? In many cases, it is not the software that is failing, but the implementation limitations or processes surrounding the use of that software. r squared can analyze your current use and help improve your return on investment. r squared can also suggest the best software for your organization and goals and assist in the selection implementation and training. Allow r squared to ensure that you are getting the value With your investment, visit r squared consulting.com today. When it comes to business, you'll find the experts here voice America business network.

You are tuned in to the work life balance to reach Rick A. Morris or his guest today, we'd love to have you call into the program at 1-866-472-5790. Again, that's 1-866-472-5790 if you'd rather send an email Rick can be reached at our Morris at r squared consulting.com. Now back to the work life balance.

Rick A. Morris  28:44  
And we're back to the third segment of the work life balance this Friday afternoon visiting with my dear friend Inga rock. First of all, could you have a cooler name to be a coach and to be I mean, there's so much Inga rocks the house in garages world There's so many things we can do within Iraq, but we gave us a really long lead. And so just to recap, let's get right to the question. What are those false beliefs that you really kind of hold us back? And what do people how do they identify and start to work with those false beliefs?

Inge Rock  29:17  
Yeah, first of all, it's very easy to believe. Right? You think it's Santa Claus.

Rick A. Morris  29:25  
By the way, I, I did that line at a graduation and I turn over and there's a whole parent section has a bunch of five, six and seven year olds. furious with me, but anyway, know your audience really know your audience go.

Inge Rock  29:38  
Oh, yes, exactly. And I know it's it's already 11:30pm in Belgium, but it's not that late.

Rick A. Morris  29:47  
I don't think I have any anybody 13 or younger listening to my show.

Inge Rock  29:51  
So yeah, it's so easy to believe why. And the reason why that is, is because we've all been programmed between and that's it. Typically prove, between the last month of pregnancy and age seven, eight. Because when we when we are born, you know, we have no cells of recognition, there is no programming, we can just eat, and sleep and cry, and some other basic stuff. But that's it. So if anything needs to be learned think of language, you know how hard it is to learn how to speak, to walk to eat properly, dress yourself, whatever. So these fours this first seven, eight years are very crucial because the child gets completely programmed and so good we, you know, we become our environment. So I spoke Dutch and I had to learn English later on, I had to learn French and learn German. And it was hard because now you have to do it consciously. When you learn something subconsciously, which is in the first seven, eight years of your life. It comes naturally You know, you don't have to think about it. Now, the rub is you, once programmed, it stays there. And most adults don't grow beyond 35 years old, they just remain the same person, and they copy pasted their daily life over and over and over again. So since the activity of the subconscious mind is 14,000 times bigger than the conscious mind, you can imagine what a storehouse that is, you know, limiting beliefs but also habits. You know, every meal that you ate every phase that you saw every word that you spoke, every place that you visited, it's in your subconscious, but ask you think back off last vacation last summer. There we are. It's so easy, you know, to get into the subconscious mind and pop up some ideas. But changing the belief system is hard work, because it is still in the subconscious mind and that's where it goes comes into place because of coach asks you the questions that you cannot ask yourself. And the first time I heard that from Christians, I was mesmerised myself like, What do you mean? I can ask questions to myself? No, you can because when you're in the frame, you don't see the picture. And I couldn't see my own picture. So it is so easy to fight or what we believe. But it's not always the best thing for us. What do we do?

Rick A. Morris  32:28  
And when those beliefs then become challenged, right, do you have that natural reaction to defend them? So what's what is a technique that you use? Or how do you start to get people to identify what those false beliefs are, but then how to start reprogramming how they feel about that belief?

Inge Rock  32:50  
Yeah, there are a few techniques that I use. The first thing I use is a self coaching model. In my programs, people go first to self coaching and then They can move on to coaching. Because I strongly believe that if you can coach yourself, you know, you become more aware you'll become stronger. And you can use more to give to other people, then if you only learn the technique to coach other people, and I changed that over the years, honestly, because I saw the power, and you know what to reach very funny. I never had a coach from the very first because, you know, I go forward from before the time of the GMT. You know, I never had a coach, when I got my certification, came back to the team came to Belgium. And I started to map out my thoughts, my feelings, my habits, my behavior, my circumstances, my results, my situations, my problems, and I made my own self coaching model where I learned now people to do for themselves, where they map out everything they feel, they think, no day, they experience the whole mumbo jumbo. The problem is, when you experience life, it is it's just amaze. It's a maze of thoughts. It's amazing feelings. It is, you know, everything's connected, especially with women is very complicated because we talk and we talk and we talk to get clarity in the knees, and then men react differently. But the bottom line is, we need to understand how we operate. So that is one thing. And the second thing is meditation. You know, I was the girl that said, Nope, not gonna do that. I'm not gonna sit on my ass and close my eyes, you know, for an hour and see, oh, we're not going to do that. And there's a form of resistance, right? I was so resistant to meditation because like, you know, the best Excuse was no I have too much energy for that, I cannot sit still, oh my gosh, what a limiting belief and then I started five minutes and 15 minutes. So, once you can go beyond the analytical mind and the other analytical mind is actually the layer between the conscious mind and the subconscious mind. So, once you get beyond the analytical mind what you do in meditation, you get access to the subconscious mind. And that is where you change those beliefs. So, first of all, I use the self coaching model so people can become aware of what they want to change about themselves. And then of course, we extract that, then we go into the meditation and we change it in the subconscious mind, but we do it ourselves right? In the meditation, I can change my subconscious mind. Doesn't mean that everything changes overnight. No, but you know what? happens, you become aware of when that limiting belief pops up the next day, during the day somehow, it's like you meet an old friend, and you say, I know you before, not this time, I'm not going to give you any attention. And then, you know, didn't your logical wires in our brain pruned away, because we don't give it an attention anymore. And that is how it changed.

Rick A. Morris  36:28  
And it's hard It takes it takes. It's the power of well, right, the willpower to continue to focus. You know, one of the things that you just said, which I found really interesting is that you didn't have a coach and I was the same way I remember going into a coaching session that was like pre paid by some program that I was doing. I was like, This is gonna be one session with a guy he was amazing. He's amazing. And so what I what I tell people now when they when they asked me about coaching or how to find coaches, that kind of stuff I said, You asked me One question. So it's nice to ask who their coaches? Oh, because if you believe in the process, then you're gonna go get a coach. So you didn't have a coach, but you have one now I'm gonna I'm gonna Oh, yeah. How many do you have now? Two, you have two. Business one per person. There it is. Yeah, I have different phases, the same thing but one's financial. one's personal one's professional. Yeah. But I think it's a great question to ask, because if they go, What do you mean? Well, who's coaching you because if you truly understand the process of coaching, then that doesn't, once you become a coach doesn't mean you don't need one.

Inge Rock  37:40  
You know, it just occurs to me. I believe that people get a coach to value themselves enough to evolve quickly, because they understand they have no time to lose. And they want to grow to the next level because they have more to give and you know, more value to put out there in the world. So, coaching is the shortcut. I mean, why would you say, hey, and wait until the light goes, the light bulb goes off? I mean, know when I get stuck one text? Yeah. Oh, I'm stuck, get me home to beer. And that is what I love so much.

Rick A. Morris  38:26  
So how do people then figure out what's possible for them? Right? We started talking about we want something more we want something better we want to grow. Maybe they've started to mess around a little bit and start to create this new awareness. How do they determine what really is possible for them in the long run?

Inge Rock  38:45  
Yeah, so first of all, there's an overall definition that is when you become aware of an idea or a concept or a wish or want a dream and it feels good. It means You can do it. Okay. So people always ask me Yeah, but what if tomorrow I want to be a prima ballerina? And you know, I'm in my late 50s. And I'm thinking, why would you get that idea? Right? It just doesn't make any sense. Now I give my audience always couple of exercises that they can do to become more and more aware of one day really want because 80% of the audience's I don't know, when I really don't know what I want. And, you know, again, that's so limiting belief. First of all, people are not aware of what they want. The subconscious mind knows already. But it's somewhere you know, somewhere in the layers. So a couple of things that you can do is first of all, go back to your childhood. What did you love so much? Did you like to climb trees dance on the tables make fencing the woods were used as a kit. go and explore that and see what's in there. Okay, write it down in a notebook and start journaling and collecting ideas from the past. Ask your brothers, your sisters, maybe your parents still around so you can become more and more aware of who you really were as a kid because you were closer to source when you were young, right? I love to play catwalks. I love to sing to dance. I made those tents free. And I love to sell. I love to sell, you know, to tumble up tickets for school and stuff like that. And then the second thing you can do is connect the dots. And you know, the legendary Stanford University speech of Steve Jobs where he says it's only when I connected the dots in my life that you know, a pattern became clear and I understood who I was in those dogs. Are landmarks, you know, times in our life that you find this good or bad, you know, turning points that made us challenge and we outgrew them. Like he's giving the example of his own when he got fired for Apple. And also, you know, the beautiful turning points did the accomplishments, the successes, and I don't know if you remember, when I was a kid, you know, we had these drawing cards with numbers 123. And we had to go from number one, number two, number three, number four, and then all of a sudden we had Mickey Mouse. You know, and that is that exercise. When you go back and you look at the major turning points in your life and you start connecting those dots. You see a pattern that talk that you know, that tells a lot of information about who you are, and what's in your personality. And I always say you know, your biggest talent, and your biggest Power is on the other side of your biggest fake pain and your your biggest setback. And when you say that people go like, oh, wow, yeah, I had some, some kicks in the book, you know, I had some turning points. And now we can look at in a different way. And I think that's really very powerful.

Rick A. Morris  42:19  
I think so too. And I think it's a good place for us to stop right here. We're going to come back with one more segment with Iraq, where we'll ask the question we ask all of our guests. And for her, we're going to go back and check what her first answer was at some point, but we'll do that right after the break. You're listening to Rick Morris in the work life balance.

VoiceAmerica  42:42  
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You are tuned in to the work life balance. To reach Rick Morris or his guest today, we'd love to have you call into the program at 1-866-472-5790. Again, that's 1-866-472-5790. If you'd rather send an email, Rick can be reached at our Morris at r squared consulting.com. Now back to the work life balance.

Rick A. Morris  44:27  
And we're back to the final segment of the work life balance on this Friday afternoon Incas. How can people get in touch with you? How do they find you on the web? How do they get ahold of you?

Inge Rock  44:38  
Well, it's very easy. My website is in ingerock.com. That's ingerock.com. But Rick, I have a present for everyone. I'd love to give a copy of my book in a version to all the participants today and they can go to ingerockbook.com, and they can have their free copy.

Rick A. Morris  45:03  
Nice. Well, thank you very much. I think that's a first I don't think I don't think we've had it to where somebody is given a gift everybody in the audience, so we appreciate that. So what's some of the best advice you've ever received?

Inge Rock  45:19  
Yes. The first thing, probably 10s you know, so many, you know, over the years, but the first one that comes to my mind is lick your wounds. Come get like, blessings move on. That was so powerful when, you know when my life collapsed. And I find my way into personal growth and development. And then Paul became, of course, my first mentor. And we were talking one day and was called beach and you know about the things that were still accurate in my life. I mean, I made a transition, but you know, was still messy. It was complete turtle and he said, lick your wounds, Count your blessings. Move on. Like, this is not the last one. You are going to have more problems, more setbacks, but you are going to grow stronger. And just you know, the faster you can move through the term. You know, the easier you can find your way back and I will never forget that. And then later on, I think five years later, I had a huge problem with with a business partner. And I remember me sitting on the stairs close to my room with Paul Martinelli on the phone and he said, unit remember a girl lick your lick your words, Count your blessings move on. Yeah, no, just give me a one more day.

Can I just look a little longer? One more.

Give me sometimes we need time to digest, you know, but I think that is that's priceless. Yeah.

Rick A. Morris  46:56  
I think that's probably one of the biggest things over My last five years of growth is the awareness of my seasons. So, you're the, if you look at me six, seven years ago, if I was trying to write the book, if I was trying to do something creative, and I wasn't in a creative mood, I'd force it. Oh, yeah, then I, you know, something that should take me an hour would take three hours, and I've ended up throwing it all away anyway. In doing so, just embracing the season. And there's days where I just, I'm just not there. And, and you know, that lick your wounds. I love it, because I'm like, Alright, well, today is gonna suck, and I'm just gonna ride the suck meter all the way. And then tomorrow, it's a new day. I'll be fresh. Off we go.

Inge Rock  47:38  
Law freedom. Yeah,

Rick A. Morris  47:40  
absolutely. Anything else you'd like to share with the audience before we wrap up today?

Inge Rock  47:46  
Well, I'd love to encourage people you know, and say, we all have returns in life. And you know, the title of the book is not by coincidence, turn your life around. I'm not going to say that everybody has To turn, you're happy and everything's going great. Right on, keep them going.

But I think the major advice is listen to your heart.

You know, we always think that the mind is the strongest power and it is, but by far the strongest creative power, but it is the heart that is the best GPS. You know. So first, always listen to your heart. And I know that is not the easiest part to do. I teach my audience by the way for all the people who are going to get the download of the book. In the end page are three meditations and the first meditation is breathing heart coherence exercise, just six minutes to start with, to, you know, to make the bridge between the brain and the heart into open the heart again, because we've become thinkers, you know, a lot of a lot of titles is think and think and and I also wrote books that start with think end. And there's a lot of power there. But don't forget that we are heart centered people, and that we need to move to a time where we can, you know, make the Connect to heart connection again, and, and create an environment. That's why I love our community so much where it's safe to open your heart because then, of course, you you reconnect with source you reconnect with the grand overall designer. And that is just that is what life is all about. And all the hints that you get from them all the feelings, just priceless grow beyond the struggle, grow beyond force or survival, like you just said, and learn to trust again from the heart. I think that's the biggest advice I can get

Rick A. Morris  49:58  
in and I appreciate I think it's something. I'm a feeler, I do a lot of things by my gut feel, which is following the heart, right? Somebody? How do you know that's gonna work? I don't know, I'll figure I'll let the market decide. But right now that feels good. That's what we want to do it so, you know, people get frustrated with me because they'll give me ideas think of what do you think and I think it's great idea because you always say that because it's your idea. Let the market prove you wrong. Don't let me prove like, I'm not gonna be the one that gave you that. Yeah, I'm not gonna prove you wrong. But follow your heart. If that's the accent. I loved what you said in an earlier segment to I mean, that idea is that divine inspiration. It's, it's basically when when people believe in different things, we'll say grand overall design, but that's when they're answering back. Right? Yeah, right. That's so you're, you're praying giving a wish that idea that comes to your subconscious and all of a sudden in your brain is the answer that yes, we'll save it. That person spoke to me that's what they're talking about.

Inge Rock  50:59  
Yeah. love the ocean adlet quote where he says I'm grateful for the idea that has used me.

Rick A. Morris  51:06  
Yeah.

Inge Rock  51:08  
As the other way around and

Rick A. Morris  51:11  
I think my favorite though is rowdy where he's persons praying for the parking space. Please guys, let me find the parking space but nevermind, gotta got one thanks.

Inge Rock  51:21  
Most quickly when you get out of the way, it moves quickly. I had

Rick A. Morris  51:26  
a big realization while you were talking about a midlife crisis. So you could kind of call it mine. But I bought a very expensive car for the for one of the first times but it was because it was on my dream board for 25 years. Wow. Put a picture of this car on my dream board when I mean I was like waiting tables. There's no way I could I couldn't afford a car at that point, very last black car. In May. The realization was like last year I was like, You know what? I'm doing it. It's been there. The energy's been there. It's time to pull the trigger. And I'm happy I did but I think that that's when we when you were talking about what's possible. I think it may not be possible today, doesn't mean it's not going to took me 25 years to realize that dream and even realize that I could, I could close on that. But the point being is, I if I wasn't aiming for anything, I would have never gotten that satisfaction in the first place.

Inge Rock  52:23  
Oh, absolutely. And we have to grow into the person who is worthy of that dream. That's right. So it takes time, you know, the law of gestation and incubation is there and you know, the only reason why we need dreams to grow into them, and then to create in your dream,

Rick A. Morris  52:42  
because that's what I'm all about. And thank you so much for taking the time and coming back on with us again, and you're always welcome on the show.

Inge Rock  52:50  
Thank you so much. It was really great honor to be here. Thank you so much week, and have a really crazy day. People

Rick A. Morris  53:01  
you as well. And next week we're going to have David stack leather on David is an agile is like me. And when I was reading his bio and what he's about he and I have some of the very same beliefs about organizations and companies that are using these buzzwords and fads thinking that they're new ideas. And he actually has a similar background to mine and being a project turnaround specialist. So I'm super excited to have him on. We'll have him on next week. That's David Steckler, that's going to be the May 8 show and we've got tons of guests. We're actually booked with guests all the way till the end of July now. So we've got a ton of good stuff coming your way here on the work life balance. We hope you continue to join in every Friday with us and until next week, we hope you live your own work life balance. We'll talk to you soon.

VoiceAmerica  53:50  
Thank you for joining us this week. The work life balance with Rick Morris can be heard live every Friday at 2pm pacific time and 5pm eastern time on The Voice America A business channel. Now that the weekend is here. It's time to rethink your priorities and enjoy it. We'll see you on our next show.


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