Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Advice to Pass: My Mother’s Favorite Sayings

I apologize to my readers for not posting anything in the last couple of weeks. My mom passed away recently and as you know by now, each event is a learning opportunity. As we were gathering for the service and meeting with the pastor, he had asked my brothers and me to reflect and talk about some of our mom's favorite sayings. He asked what were things that we would hear around the house and things that she said that we will never forget. Here are some of those sayings:

If you seem to have a problem with the whole world, maybe it isn't the world with the problem. Ever feel that way? That it seems the whole world is coming down on you? I definitely know the feeling. When my mom would say this to me, it was not something that I really wanted to hear. Especially at that time! However, when I would think about it, I would be experiencing a defeatist attitude or just overall having a grumpy day. This saying would make me step back and think about how I was approaching the day. Believe it or not, it helped.

Someone needs to go back to their room and have an attitude adjustment! This was another famous saying that you didn't want to hear. Again, a grumpy day was taking over. We would go back in to our room and begin. It would first start with a mumbling of, "I don't have an attitude problem, she has the attitude problem." I would then trail off. Pretty soon, I would forget about what I was mad about in the first place and lo and behold, the attitude adjustment would work!

If you want someone to learn a behavior or skill, make them care about it. My mom was a saleswoman and seminar leader as well. She always would tell us the story of how motivation truly works. She would tell the story this way:

Ask somebody to learn how to play the tuba. Most likely, they will not or they will say that they can't. Now, take away their family, or home, or something that they hold dear. Tell them that they can't get it back until they learn how to play a specific song on the tuba. Amazingly, they will learn how to play the tuba.

The moral of the story is that unless they care about learning, doing, or being a part of whatever it is you want them to do, it won't happen. Find a way to make them care, and you will get results.

My mom had tons of sayings and knowledge nuggets that she passed on. I know my brothers and I are successful due to the drive, determination, and work ethic that she helped form in us. She will be missed. Rest in peace.



Lori Hagewood said...

Very nice post, and thanks for sharing these things with us!

Lorelie Kaid said...

Rick, I am sorry to hear of your mother's passing but really can relate to the quotes you shared. Hindsight is always 20/20 when it comes to our parent's advice - Your twin, Lorelie Kaid

Pat Kimpton said...

Rick- so sorry to hear about your mom, but now I know why I always felt like you're my little brother- I think we were born to the same mom! Your heart is heavy now but these wonderful nuggets will come to mind when you least expect it and they will always make you smile!
love, Pat Kimpton

Kelly said...

Sorry for your loss. I lost my grandfather this year. He was a huge inspiration and motivator for our family. I love your tribute!